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  • ~Would All The Pleasers Please Stand?~

    I've written about this before but I've got to do it again.

    This is primarily for those of us who tend to be "pleasers".
    If you have no problem offending someone, or if you always speak your mind  whether or not your opinion is requested, don't  read this. You may have other issues to work on.   There's always a ditch on either side of the road.
    This is in no way a license to have an "in your face" attitude.

    Back to us.
    We want approval and strive to get it one way or another. We want to know we are doing a good job, and that we matter. (maybe in me, that's part pleaser and part middle child complex......whatever)
    Furthermore, we don't like conflict and avoid it if at all possible.

    We're all supposed to know that we each have a calling. Right? There is something we were put on this earth to do. Maybe we will never see the fruit of our labor but we all have a part to play. It's vital, important, necessary. It's closely intertwined with our gifting, talents, and abilities.

     I remember reading about Susanna Wesley during my  school years. She was "just" a mother who did just that----mothered. She just happened to give birth to many children, two of whom you may have read about: John and Charles. They were obviously influential. She, on the other hand, while just as influential, mainly changed diapers, rocked babies, disciplined children, and gave herself to her family. Out of my brief study of her life, I began to  understand that God doesn't view success in the same way human beings tend to.
    He alone should be our audience. The One we aim to please.

    That was my first step towards finding true contentment and comfort in what I would spend my life doing.
    I became very satisfied with the revelation that my role was in fact, an important one.

    I could spend my life in a hut in a South American rain forest, taking care of an elderly woman and if I was doing what God put in my hands to do, then I would have met success.

    If no one ever saw me, knew my name, or read about me in a book, I would meet my Maker and would hear the words, "Well done".

    So, YAY! I can be Mom and as long as I am open to hear God's voice and obey, then when I get to heaven, God will be waiting to give me my  A+ sticker.

    The problem for me was that even after settling the issue of every calling being valuable, there came this matter of talents and gifting.  Those were, after all a result of how hard I worked, how motivated I was, how favored I was, how fortunate I was, or what a good wife and mother I was.

    That part was all up to me....and I better measure up.

    After all, in the Mom Club, the really good ones are really talented.
    They have home businesses, they are chefs in their kitchen, cooking with ingredients bought for nothing, thanks to their handy dandy coupon collection. They make their own drapes. They take amazing photographs. They are chipper in the mornings.
     

    .....then all of a sudden, I saw it. 
    I saw myself, standing before my Lord.
    naked.
    My hands were empty.
    It was just me.
    I didn't have a little bag with me, filled with my human traits.
    His eyes bored a hole straight through all those things I had always seen as strengths or weaknesses so that He saw only one thing.

    My heart.
     
    Not my strengths or weaknesses.
    Not my pictures that I so love taking.
    Not how physically fit or unfit I am.
    Not my beauty or lack thereof.
    Just my heart.
    Not even my gifting.

    All the things that make me who I am are valuable but  only because they are a reflection of God in me......not me in me.

    Do we really get that?
    To really get a glimpse of freedom from others' opinions is life changing.
    People's opinions of you do not matter.
    "I know."
    No, you probably don't.
    People's opinions of you do not matter.
    Do you believe that even the opinions of Christians don't matter?

    "Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ." Gal 1:10


    ~stacey

  • Life

    I really have a lot I'm itching to write about but am struggling to find an hour or even just half an hour to get it done. We are settling into a school/fall routine and are starting to figure things out.

    I still can't believe that between three different schools with different starting and ending times, ballet, speech, and gymnastics, there is no logistical impossibility. I can get people to where they need to be on time. Football starts up this week which may blow all of that right out of the water.......we shall see!



    I can't believe I have a six month old. Nor can I believe how sweet she is. Because half our day is spent in the car, poor thing falls asleep in her seat, is rudely awakened by my unbuckling her sweet, chubby body, only to be put in her bed to finish her nap. She kindly rolls over, gets her thumb and gets to sleeping.

    God's grace is everywhere I look. This year's teachers, a new school that is an absolute gift, friends, provision, and peace.

    Some excerpts from tonight's dinner table conversation:
    "Mom, when we go to heaven, will be children again? Or will we stay old?"

    "THIS is not a forever place. Heaven is the forever place."

    "I do NOT want to be the first one of us to get married 'cause I don't want to kiss on the lips."

    "What is the purpose of a house? To give you shelter. To keep you dry and warm or cool. So any house that does that is a nice house and one to be thankful for."

    Sleep well.

    ~stacey

  • ~Running of the Bulls~

    Let the rat race begin.

    I'm having a vision of bulls tearing down the streets in Spain. Dust is flying, flags are waving, people are screaming with panic stricken faces.  Running for their lives. I feel just like what I imagine those poor animals, or people, for that matter, to feel like.

    I've spent the better part of today, sweating, my stomach in a bit of a knot thanks to my August calendar filling up in a matter of seconds. I'm not one who simultaneously thinks in more than three different directions at a time with ease. I can do it, but I'm in a constant state of sweat-as previously mentioned-, overly emotional, and am bound to forget something somewhere in the mix.  

    Shot records to retrieve, school supplies purchased,  multiple orientations, three different first days of school, ballet, gymnastics, flag football starting, two birthdays, one baby shower, a clothing party, doctor appointments, a broken A/C unit in 95 degree heat, on top of regular laundry mountain, meal prep, caring for a very sweet six month old, and other things I'm forgetting, means things are about to start getting pretty busy around here.

    God bless all you Mothers out there.
    Here's to sitting around all day, watching soaps, eating bon bons.
    I wish we could all meet up for a pedicure in about two weeks!
    I'm going to need one.

    When the dust settles, I'll be fine.
    Thankfully, the anticipation of shifting gears is worse than the actual shifting.

    Now that I'm sweating not only from my nerves, but because it's stinkin' hot in this house, I'm going to go lie under a fan.



    ~stacey

  • ~Can't Help Myself~

    I'm sorry for those of you who have already seen this on my fb or elsewhere. I just laugh every time I watch it and couldn't help but post it on xanga.
    After all, it is Friday.....so a little laughter is in order.

  • ~Tid Bits of Recent Life~

    I think I did it.
    I pushed him over the edge.
    He reached his breaking point.
    It was bound to happen.

    I am notorious for having really great ideas. They all just happen to be great ideas that require a WHOLE lot of work. Lucky for me, I married a man that can switch a gear and become a real work horse. I have named it "Tasmanian Devil Mode". I beg him to morph into that man when I need a whole lot done in a short amount of time.
    This line that was crossed this weekend, however, was his own fault. He declared a "project weekend". It wasn't my idea but I won't lie.....I was THRILLED. He knew that I had started (and messed up) the job of painting all my interior doors a nice dark black/brown color named Stout.
    (It's name is perfect and it is heaven on a door or mantle.)

    Anyway, the three doors I had done, I had neglected to sand before painting. The paint was practically jumping off the door. Any little hand that grazed it just right, peeled back another glimpse of the shiny white wood underneath my lovely chocolaty color.

    After two FULL days, 8 doors almost done, four still to go, one trip to Lowe's, many sheets of sandpaper, countless screws and hinges, a few choice words, a whole bunch of sweat, and only a little bit of laughing, I think it's safe to say this just might be our last home improvement project we ever do ourselves.
    I'm so not kidding.

    There were some bright spots, like.....uhm....I dunno....Oh! When I laughed so hard I almost....well you know. He was in the garage, sweating like a mad man and I asked him if I could bring him anything. He quickly, dryly responded, "YEAH, a GUN so I can shoot myself!!! This was the worst idea EVER!!!!"

    that was funny. oh  my goodness it was funny. you just have to know brad.......

    I think, while it was a productive weekend, we're both okay with a new week beginning and have learned some valuable lessons.

    #1 GET AN ESTIMATE. there's no shame in that. just take a quick gander at the going rate for all those "little" projects you want done.

    #2 IT REALLY IS COOLER TO WORK IN A SHIRT WITH THE SLEEVES CUT OUT. it ain't pretty but the man is NOT okay with being hot..


    What a fun summer we're having. Not ready to see it end.


    Discovering Her Hands
    Excuse the corner of my window I didn't edit out. And never mind that I was driving 70 mph when I took it. It sounds worse than it was. I was looking at the road and just pointed my camera that direction. Promise.


    Flying


    Can't get enough of her



    one of my favorite notes ever.

    She lost a tooth.
    Her first one. (of natural causes anyway)

    I was just cleaning out my closet. Not ordinarily a time for emotion. Then I saw this box from our move last year. There it is.
    Proof that up until a year ago, to my children, I was "Honey". Never "Mom" or "Mama" but "Honey".
    I never once told them what to call me. Jake just always said it and the others followed suit.
    I often forgot it was unusual until someone would overhear and ask, "What did they just call you?"

    My sweet babies are growing up too fast for my liking.
    Their children will definitely have to call me Honey.

    ~stacey

  • Our Week

    We left for our usual get away spot in the mountains to celebrate July 4th.
    It's become quite a habit actually. The kids absolutely can NOT wait to get there.
    I've thought a lot about what makes it so much fun for them.
    It's in the middle of the woods so it's definitely not the exciting entertainment factor.

    They have room to stretch their legs.
    To run in the grass, fly on the tree swing, throw a fishing pole in the pond, get in the creek to check their home made dam, and ride the "mountain goat" with Grandpa.



    There are a couple  COUNtry cooking restaurants we always visit that they love.
    Shucking and eating corn is always going to happen if we're there when it's warm.



    We sit on the porch making smores while being serenaded by bull frogs.
    Cell phones don't work there. It's great.
    Things are quiet. Simple.




    In the car, the kids and I talked about what it means to stand alone.
    Doing what you know to be right, no matter what people around you do.
     I sounded like my Dad that day. Talking, talking.
    I hope it gets in somehow.
    I hope their little brains are filing it away, soaking it up.
    I can't force their hearts but I can live before them in honesty, humility, and truth.

    This little one was all about the fireworks. If I could have gotten my camera and captured her sweet face as she stared in wonder at the exploding sky, I would have.
    It was priceless.


    Possibly the cutest celebratory high stepping I've ever seen in my life.
    Look at his eyes. He was slightly embarrassed but he knew it was funny.

    My brave one. She'll do just about anything. And loves it.

    I've got a million more pictures I would love to post and things I want to say but it's after midnight. The kids and I got home just a few hours ago from a visit with my Mom. My den is full of suitcases and bags that haven't yet made it to their appropriate bedrooms. Imagine it. They don't walk.....I have to take them. *sigh*
    I felt like a little mouse, scurrying in to the kitchen after everyone else was tucked in tight to get to my very old laptop. I can hardly wait to transfer my little memories from camera to computer after a week like this. It's a little like Christmas to me.


    As for my morning that's almost here, it will look a little something like this:

    Then this:

    Then I'll get busy.

    ~stacey

  • ~wordy wednesday~

     

     Wordy Wednesday is BACK! well, sort of....


    I have for you today, three bits of really beautiful words from three of my favorite books/movies.

    Do you know them?


    #1 ~"You must know... surely, you must know it was all for you. You are too generous to trifle with me. I believe you spoke with my aunt last night, and it has taught me to hope as I'd scarcely allowed myself before. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I will have to tell you: you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on."

     

    #2 ~"My heart is, and always will be, yours."


    #3~ "So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day."


     ~stacey

     
     
     

  • Then And Now

    We used to actually pop popcorn on the stove. Add our own salt, melt a little butter, and drizzle.

    A phone was a rather bulky thing that hung on a wall with a really long curly cord. I have images of my Mom at the stove, phone on one ear, with that long cord stretched all the way across the kitchen. I used to swing it like a jump rope.

    My memories of a computer consists mostly of  learning "boot" and "DOS".

    Wanted to watch The A-Team? You had to be IN your den, ready to watch  AT 8:00 Friday night. There was no pausing or rewinding live television.

    Christmas lists were a result of hours spent thumbing through the Sears catalog. Now, between infomercials of Pillow Pets, or toysrus.com, who needs a catalog?

    We had to roll down the car window. Not "push a button it down" but manually crank the roller! ( I do remember once having a big sedan with electric windows. It felt fancy.)

    In the summer, we slept with our windows open.

    Kids had their birthday parties at home. We played games like balloon toss or tug of war and ate cake.
    That was it. And it was so much fun.

    We fought over who got to sit on the "hump". (aka: the armrest in the front seat in the Buick) Seat belts?? Nah.


    ~What a difference some years make~

    Could be a good look for me. Brad might not agree but I think there's potential here!



    ~Stacey

     

  • "We Were Soldiers"

  • ~A Holiday I Get Excited About~

    Second only to Christmas, Independence Day is my favorite holiday.
    July 4th just makes me happy.
    And so incredibly grateful.
    In fact, weird as it may be, I'm nearly brought to tears at the end of the fireworks show every year.
    It's the sound, I think.
    It's always so loud and I wonder if it's much different in war.
    All those guys before me who have spent sleepless nights in fox holes, enduring whistling rockets overhead or explosions nearby, made it possible for me to not be terrified by very similar sounds.

    It's barbecue and flags.
    It's my Daddy's Marine Corp Band marching music playing all day. 
    To my kids, it's our flag's birthday and a really good reason to get excited and throw those little popper things. They just learned they can snap them and not burn their fingers.....should be a great 4th.

    ~Stacey