March 30, 2011

  • Grow Up

    This is one of those nights I could stay up til two in the morning.

    Kids are sleeping, Brad and I just finished watching American Idol and he’s off to bed. Busy day in the O.R. tomorrow, he says. He routinely gets up at 5:30. If it’s not for his men’s Bibly study, it’s for rounding, or…..wait for it………

    a workout.whatevah

    Without a doubt, if I got up at 5:30 to work out, I would most certainly be sick to my stomach. Don’t know how he does it.

    I’m a nine a.m. workout kind of girl.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    My mind is going in so many directions that trying to go to sleep is pointless.

    The older I get, the more I think the issues you face in life are pretty much the same whether you are 6 or 36.

    Maybe it’s a matter of women not ever really growing up. I mean really growing up. Getting older, calmer, wiser, more solid, more graceful, and more confident.

    Isn’t that the goal?

    How many of us really get a handle on insecurities, for example? Do we really learn where our significance comes from and where our sense of worth originates or do we just learn to mask our emotions and control our outward responses?

    As I parent my children, I keep thinking about how I am preparing them to deal with “real life issues”. The hard, cold fact is that most things they face in first grade, they’re going to face in their teens, twenties, and thirties. The “real” starts early.

    I never want to minimize the feeling of being left out because it’s a legitimate complaint, (I’ve experienced it recently) but I want to teach them to process that bad emotion, cry it out, and then move past it.

    Stop dwelling on yourself. What are you thankful for? Who can you bless? Who can you be a friend to?

    I don’t want my kids to find happiness in being popular, having the right friends, having the right brand of clothing, or having the right house.

    You can be in a sea of people you call friends and be lonely.

                  You can have fancy clothes and feel not good enough.

                                You can be in a great house and feel dissatisfied and discontent.

    Doesn’t it always blow your mind when you read something about a beauty queen struggling with an eating disorder because she thinks she’s not skinny enough or pretty enough?

    I want to raise sturdy kids. Kids with strong character. Kids that think beyond themselves.

    So to my children:

    You will, most likely more than once in your life, be excluded from something. Please don’t be the one doing the excluding. You will sometimes be taken advantage of by someone. Be sensitive to people. There are reasons people behave badly. It’s not an excuse but have compassionate eyes to see past the rude behavior. Don’t find your identity in anything other than who you are in Christ. Have fun where you are, and love whomever you’re with. You will be the life of the party if you live in freedom. Freedom from everything that is not God in you. Freedom from the “green slimy stuff”, as Grandma calls it. Don’t get caught up in things that don’t last. Everything that is not eternal can be gone in the blink of an eye. Lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven. True contentment will be with you in whatever state or condition you find yourself. It’s a choice and you have to practice it.

     Contentment vs. Covetousness

    Realizing that God has provided everything I need for my present happiness (I Timothy 6:8)

     It’s midnight and I can’t hold my eyes open any longer. Today was busy. Tomorrow morning is going to come early….I think I see a nap on Thursday’s calendar.

     

    ~stacey

     

     

Comments (19)

  • “You will be the life of the party if you live in freedom.” I love this line. It made me smile. And it’s true. I’m learning that the more I come out of self-absorption, the more enjoyable I am. I’m a blast to be with if I’m not worried about defending myself or being funnier than someone else or creating some sort of ridiculous persona in social settings. The at-peace-with-herself, happy-in-her-own-skin Lauren is the best version. I hope your kids figure that out earlier than I did. :)

  • Stacey,

    I am so very grateful that for some reason, God allowed you to be working at Eye Associates at the same time I was there. I have a few memories from that time and then we moved on to different paths. I am so grateful to know you and to be able to read your heart in these pages you write…they remind me of the gentleness that is God’s spirit. You remind me constatly to be focused on things above. You’re husband and children have a treasure in you. much love, jennifer

  • Love the letter to your kids…so true.
    You are so right, if it’s not eternal it can be gone in the blink of an eye.
    Lots of good “late night” thoughts here! =)
    Hope you have a great day today…enjoy your nap if you can fit one in! ;)

  • “It’s a choice and you have to practice it.”
    So many gems of truth are hidden in this post. I have dealt with a lot of the being “left out” as my daughter started Kindergarten this year and she hasn’t really made any close friends. She told me one day, “Mom, I just know that I am different then the other kids, I just like to sing and write songs and have time to myself and maybe someday they will want to be different like me.” I am thankful that she is ok with being different and I hope this sticks with her.

  • @Elizabethmarie_1 - I’m afraid a nap is wishful thinking!

  • @rugbana -  Hope your daughter makes a really great friend soon. Before we moved to our current and hopefully permanent city, we had a year of living in limbo and we all felt a little isolated. We knew we wouldn’t live there for more than 12 months, but still, it was a lonely year and I prayed so hard for friends in our next location. God has been faithful in that regard. He knows what we need and can teach us such valuable lessons in difficult circumstances.

  • i soooo needed this today. being back at work has really revealed to me just how much i depend on others to kind of define my worth. and i’ve seen how much my view of myself as worthwhile has taken a hit in the circumstances of the past several months. thank you for sharing this today. i hope you don’t mind…i’m going to quote from it (but i’ll link back to you!)

  • I found your blog via “mytoesareblue” and I loved this post. Especially your letter to your children.

  • great post, I loved your letter to your children too. I agree that many things we deal with continue into life. I recently told my hubby that we needed to deal with “our stuff” before God so that our kids don’t have to look at it in old age. Anything we struggle with comes out then, so much better to give it over to the Lord now! As parents we can see things in our children, and I know God sees our things too.

  • such true words!

  • This is SO good. Especially the letter to your kids. : )

  • @Lauren Hall - this is when I need a “like” button. I hear ya and yes, I’m hoping my kids figure out things a little quicker than I have.

  • Mytoesareblue posted a link that sent me over here and this is so well written I am glad I came! This whole week that has been my #1 thought how freedom comes in finding our true self in the one who created us. Thank you for sharing!

  • wish that we were in comfy chairs with coffee mugs in our hands so that i could hear more about all of this good thinking you have going on. besides the being a 9am workout kinda girl part. :)  love your words stacey.

  • good thoughts girl! you are one wise mama.. preparing your kids to see beyond themselves, but also preparing them that just because they do doesn’t mean that will shield them from hurt, or from still struggling…

    glad you’re blogging again.
    your posts always hit home w/ me. :)

  • that’s one of my favorite headers too! i so want to be THERE.. in that spot. :)

  • Beautiful thought! I want to raise sturdy kids. Kids with strong character. Kids that think beyond themselves … those are exactally my thoughts! You have a beautiful blog!

  • What a lovely post.  I’d call your blog a serene place to come to.

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